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Overwhelmed

 Hevoi

I am a little overwhelmed right now, honestly my health is my main problem, I get flare-ups when the seasons change and it's manageable but bad right now.

I made a portable work desk that I can fit a blanket over and under because I am sensitive to the cold, it can be a trigger so staying warm all winter and still working is the goal. I realise I also need a small rug for it. I am thinking of eventually making some nice quilts for the desk to match with my clothes. Yes I know I have issues, so what if I am a little extra, I only live once.

So this week I am not supposed to draw, I am working the money job because I need to finance this my seasonal hobby-esq job in the fine art that I never went to school for. If I ever get the chance, I would love to study art history or even fine art, art history because I love studying history and art because doodling makes me happy. 

The idea is to make 6 more drawings before I leave, I am on the first one. I want to hit the ground running when I get there, I don't really have to, but I am going to try. So I need to do some reference studies for the other 5. I don't know why but my relationship with drawing for money is so tumultuous, I love drawing and I love making my own money but I struggle with merging them together, luckily I am not drawing clothes for this market so there is hope for me in all of this. 

My money job is coming along so slowly, honestly, I could be halfway through detailing that log right now. I look forward to not having my attention divided. The things I can do with a one track mind, are just unbelievable. I remember starving myself for 3 hours because I wanted my first ever proper fashion sketches for a competition that had it's deadline the next day. I just said to myself I wouldn't eat until I got them right. I got the 5 of them right in 3 hours because I like my food after wasting 4 hours in the morning, telling myself I don't know how lol. Lunch was a motivator. Honestly I am wasting time with this. I think I should just multi task. Anyway see you later today


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